I feel so vulnerable today!!

I think most of you are aware that I recently published a book called, No Cheese Please.  It is an adorable children’s book that I am extremely proud of.

I am proud of the content.  I am proud of the final copy.  I am proud of the audaciousness I had to muster to let it go out into the world.  And here we are….

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It is almost here.  Or there- in the real world where you all are.  It is available on Amazon and the presale has been tremendously successful.  Thank you all you out there who have already bought a copy or two, or 5 or 7… you know who you are!

Why do I feel most vulnerable today?  Today I began the arduous tasks of actually stepping out of my creativity (a place I am SUPER comfortable in) and into the world of “selling/promoting”.  This is a place where I am not at ease.  Please don’t misunderstand me, I BELIEVE in this project and I am CONFIDENT in what I am sharing, it just is HARD, you guys, when you ask others to come along with you and sip some of your Kool Aid! And to buy into it, literally.

So today I created the invitation to my Book Launch Celebration where I am inviting my friends and family to come and help us celebrate this really cool thing.  I am so excited but I have to be honest, when I hit ‘Send Evite’, I had heart palpitations.  All these negative thoughts crept in my head.  Or rather, if I am going to be honest, they didn’t sneak in- I was the one saying them.

“What if no one comes but you, you husband and your kids?”

“What if people presume you have no talent and don’t want to buy anything you made?”

“You have some nerve making something and then thinking anyone would PAY for it!”

The list of self-doubt and self-hate questions kept going.  I was so nervous.  I am still.

And then I got to thinking… Do I want these books to sell?  Absolutely!  I think that will be amazing and exciting and I will be honored that anyone would invest their hard-earned money into something I created and released into this crazy world.  BUT, I am not doing it for that.  I didn’t make the decision to focus on my writing for the accolades.  I decided to do this for ME!   The positive reviews and the excellent reception thus far is the cherry on top for me.

Will some people out there have negative thoughts about me?  Or about my audacity to do this thing?  I sadly presume so.  I can’t change them.  I learned from experience that people make up their minds about you typically with or without any action or evidence from you.   And those people, aren’t people you want around anyway.

Getting back to this party- I am still nervous.  I am still wanting everything to be a huge success and I want everyone to leave feeling empowered to do whatever  it is they want to do.  But I am doing this thing.  And the feeling I get from THAT…from the actual DOING supersedes any negativity I can spew at myself.

Thank you for letting me share my vulnerability here.  This community has come to be place I feel safe and free.  Kudos to you all for that.

XOXO

 

Capsule Wardrobe Is So Much More Than I’d Hoped

Well, I have had Purple Heart come two more times to pick up bags upon bags of clothes, shoes and accessories that I just won’t let weigh me down any longer!  It feels so great and my closet is slowly but surely emptying and I am placing pieces in it that make me look and feel great!

Some articles of clothing I have added are:

Each piece compliments nicely those items I have decided to keep as well as items I have purchased thus far!

What I have learned with this new Minimalist approach is that we hold on to so much STUFF!  And I am saying WE because I am pretty sure I am not alone in this.  I have already told you all what sorts of things I had in my closet.  Things that didn’t fit, things that didn’t compliment my TODAY body and things even the 80’s weren’t calling to get back.

I can’t tell you all how liberating and freeing it feels to get rid of some stuff.  Maybe you don’t have to be as dramatic (who me, dramatic?) and revamp and minimize your entire wardrobe but what not try to lighten your load on a smaller scale, say, your pants?  Or your t-shirts?  Hell, even your socks?  Baby steps will lead to leaps, I promise.   Maybe it isn’t even clothes for you.  Maybe it is just stuff in the attic you are holding onto for who knows what or one too many “junk drawers” in the kitchen.  De-cluttering will have a domino effect.  You just wait and see.  You intend to organize one drawer and it will spiral into more…

That is my hope anyway.  That once I clear my closet of the excess, I can focus on the core- which is me.  When all that time I wasted worrying about what I looked like and if this went with that is free and clear, I will have that time to spend on ME and what sort of self I want to  be.

MINIMIZING THE MATERIAL THINGS TO MAXIMIZE MYSELF! 

XOXO

 

Viva Las Vegas!

Another item has been checked off my bucket list thanks to my amazing husband.  I will forever wonder what I did to deserve him.  It like that song in Sound of Music, “Something Good”.  That song sums up my feelings about my Mister pretty well.  Check it out here if you haven’t heard it before.  Which you should have because- Hello?  Sound of Music… but Broadway musts are a blog post for another day…

So off to Vegas we went and it was a first for us both.  I don’t think either of us knew what to expect.  Sure, you see it on movies and in television shows, but what was it REALLY going to be like?  The answer in short?  Just what I was expecting.  A lot of people, a lot of lights.  A lot of reasons to raise eyebrows and a ton of reasons to smile and laugh.  We had a great time!

We gambled, we stayed at the Venetian, we gambled, we went to the Hoover Dam, we gambled, we saw a comedian, we gambled, we hit a jackpot (whatever we didn’t give back to the casino is already in the bank so don’t come a-knockin’)…It was just a fun time.

I thought about the city’s nickname while we were there.  Sin City.  And its funny, right?  There are all these illicit things happening around and I was oblivious to them all.  Nothing sinful about our trip.  Just a hubby and wife checking things off their bucket lists.  Having fun and making memories.  And it occurred to me.  Things, people and places are only as “bad” or “sinful” as we allow them to be.  We choose what we let into our lives and what we shun out.

I am sure there are people out there reading this that have Vegas stories that would knock our socks off.  And of course, the old adage, “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.” must be the mantra of many or why would it be the city’s slogan.  But WHY?  Why live a life like that?  Why be that type of person?  Why allow those things into our lives?  Our story?  What happened in Vegas are things we can tell our kids in the years to come.   Doesn’t make for a great t-shirt but it does make for a great life!  Its nice living that kind of life.

XOXO

 

 

 

Capsule Wardrobe Update

Well.  I am on my way to making this capsule wardrobe a success.  I currently have 6 full bags ready to go to the Purple Heart and I have a few items on eBay (more to list today) and I have not even finished going through all my clothes yet.

Some things I have kept:

Pair of “dress” jeans-dark

Long Sleeve white Tshirt

Black zip up vest

Black trousers

Khaki trousers

Denim jacket

Baby blue button down blouse

White button down with tiny black polka dots

Black leggings

1 pair of funky Lula Roe leggings (gotta have some crazy color sometimes, right?)

Some things I have recently bought:

41Q+G1RgcIL._SY90_ This classic white button down blouse

4160CGttzSL._SY90_  These comfortable nude pumps

51GT7QwMGxL._SY90_ These adorable leopard print booties

41KTNl4AzPL._SX90_ These AMAZING pumps for a pop of color

31b8E9jCPdL._SX90_ This timeless black pump

 

I will show you more things as I get them in!  This has been a liberating experience and today I had such a great time dressing.  It was easy, thoughtless while being totally thoughtful and I feel great about how I look!

Onward we go!

 

 

Capsule Wardrobe? I think so!

I know the upcoming book is the latest buzz here and BELIEVE ME, I am so unimaginably excited for that but I wanted to take a break from that briefly to tell you all something else big I have been pondering.

About a year ago, I heard of someone online who created a “capsule wardrobe” with 37 pieces of clothing for each season.  I distinctly remember thinking, “That is a great idea!  Take a minimalist approach and make getting dressed each day easy-peasy.”.

For any of you who are not aware of what a capsule wardrobe is, let me enlighten you.  A capsule wardrobe is when one has limited number of ‘classic’ essentials that all tie together to create nearly endless outfit combinations. As I mentioned above, the particular organizer I came across had the magic number of 37 (including coats, purses and shoes) articles of clothing.  Undergarments and work out clothes don’t count.  You have a capsule wardrobe for each season which would leave someone with a max of 148 articles of clothing for the whole year.  Not a lot.   Believe me.

I have had about 12 months since I came upon that little gold nugget on the world wide web.  Where am I now all that time later?  Inundated with clothes that are too big, clothes that are too small and clothes that I haven’t worn since Bush was president!  While not the first Bush it is still a long freaking time ago!   I have been hoarding these clothes and I have also been adding to the pile.  As a matter of fact, I seemed to do a complete 180 from what it was I was so intrigued by last year.  I went the complete opposite of minimalist and now have a walk-in and 2 full dressers filled.  And I mean FILLED with clothes.  People, I have 39 cardigans.  I went through a brief (but huge) LuLaRoe legging surge – I shudder to even tell you the number.  But since we are all friends here, I can tell you- 28 pair of LulaRoe leggings.  If you are familiar with this brand, you will know, they go with NOTHING.  They are wild prints in wild colors.  Not conducive AT ALL to capsule wardrobing.

So I got to thinking again about capsule wardrobes and came to this realization that I had gone so far in the opposite direction that I had to ask myself why.  Really ask myself.  The get into your own head and entertain no bullshit kind of self-talk.  I think I came up with a few valid answers to this situation.

  1. Still being unhappy with where my body is physically after all these kids and all this unhealthy eating, shopping is NO FUN.  Heck, even getting dressed isn’t fun.  As a result, I kind of rush through it and buy, buy, buy without taking the time to buy what will look good.
  2. This is a big one, I keep telling myself that I don’t want to buy anymore clothes until I am where I want to be weight-wise.  That is great in theory but detrimental for me and I will tell you why.  Yes, on paper it makes sense not to spend money when you have every intention to lose weight.  However, when someone gets dressed each day and truly doesn’t like what they see or how their clothes feel, it kind of keeps them in a dark place.  And as a result, they neglect their journey to health and hot mama living.
  3. The LulaRoe.  I think I can describe that pretty simply.  One, they are comfortable as ALL GET OUT.  Seriously.  Totally like butter.  Number two, they are so colorful and the prints are so fun.  But not 28 pair fun.  I think that was almost a way to (subconsciously?) distract people from how I was feeling about my looks?  How could I possibly feel bad or sad when my pants were screaming vibrant joy?  I think one pair is good for my capsule wardrobe.  Check eBay for some hot sales on these leggings worn only once.  🙂

So I have decided that I will be purging the bulk of my wardrobe and will be creating this capsule wardrobe for myself.  Today.  The body I have today.  I will focus on building a beautiful and complimentary wardrobe.  I believe completely that by beginning my capsule wardrobe today, it will help me get to the body I want tomorrow.  I need to feel good about the body I have right now.  I mean, people still see me, right?  Shouldn’t they see the best version of myself I can put together?  More importantly, shouldn’t my husband and children?  I want them to be proud of me.  Proud to call me theirs.

I am doing this and I am going to be documenting this and I hope you all will find it fun and perhaps even inspiring. I want to go to my closet and be confident that whatever I choose; goes together, looks great on me and makes my family nod and say, “That’s right, she’s with us!”

First round of business- a serious purge deadline.  And I have done it.  I have requested that Purple Heart make a Pickup on 02/11.  I am going to be donating clothes, shoes, bags, etc.  This is gonna be so nuts but so exhilarating as well!  Hope you follow on the journey!

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The Creative Spark…

I share the belief with many that we are all creative beings.  Each human has the capacity to make, create, build and dream a little piece of the world for themselves.  Do any of us know a child who doesn’t color?  A child who doesn’t imagine mystical realms?   The truth is we are all creative but we are not all brave.

Creating takes Courage.  It requires that we muster up the toughness to fight off our insecurities.  Insecurities that present themselves as inner voices we hear that tell us we don’t have the ‘right’ to make whatever it is we wish to make.  The self-whispers that tell us there is no one out in the world who wants what we have to create.

Children don’t care.  They are brave without even intending to me.  They haven’t been pushed down by society yet to think that any art they create may be “bad”.  To their eyes, each paper they paint, color or tear is a masterpiece.  Seems to me that this realization proves children are not only brave, but extremely smart as well.

If you are lucky enough to have a creative child, which is to say, you have children- let them create.  Encourage it. Support it.  Embrace it.  And believe in it.  Your positive words and actions will foster their creative spark and will let it catch fire.  Anything else would be a huge disservice to them and to the world who is waiting for more awesomeness to be created.  And while you are at it, go create something yourself!

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